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Thursday, May 6, 2010

SHE Series Part II Excerpt

"The common thread I see running through the stories of the women in Jesus’ life is that an encounter with Jesus is life changing! These women encountered Jesus while broken, sick, confused, abandoned, used, abused, neglected, poor, tired, mistreated, ill-reputed, determined and some just plain mean. But…they came to Jesus one way, and they left changed for the better. They were made whole, they were healed, and they were enlightened. They were rescued, redeemed, and relieved. They were accepted as they were and honored for who they were. They received purpose, were given respect, and handled with gentleness, goodness, and kindness, and restored back to life. 'The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.' – Jesus, in John 10:10" - excerpt from next Sunday's SHE Series Part II

Sunday, May 2, 2010

SHE Part 1 Notes

(These are my notes from Sunday May 2nd, 2010 for the first part of the "SHE" series)
SHE – is the crowning last piece of God’s creation. When all was created and God steps back and says it is all good…He raises the bar and says wait, I can go one better. This is good, but I can do better. We must always remember that SHE was on the mind and heart of God long before the heart or mind of any man. Ladies, if you’re alone and waiting for the right one to come along, I encourage you to remember who was thinking of you first…
SHE – is the mother of all living. God created Adam, God created Eve. SHE was the beginning of the rest. This makes her the last of God’s creation and the first of how that creation is to work itself out.
SHE – is Adam’s equal; not above him or below him but in his words, “bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.” Toe to toe, eye to eye, shoulder to shoulder…just like me.
SHE – is an independent thinker; a learner and adapter. SHE is more than the finishing touch on God’s creation SHE is what enables creation to be finished and flourishing.
SHE – is a friend and source of strength. SHE sticks with it through the tough times as well as the easy times. SHE is in the sweet easy life of the garden and SHE is there in the wilderness and sweat. SHE is there in the life and SHE is there in the death.
SHE – if SHE isn’t living in her God-given design…the rest of us aren’t living in ours!


Proverbs 31:10-31 is not a list of qualifications, requirements, or duties; but an observation of character traits that allow a woman to see where she is at in her life when it comes to her self-worth, or her relationship with God, or her relationship to her husband, her children, her boss, or her employees. It established her social standings and recognizes the depths of her involvement in her home and community and how capable she is to handle them.

Vs 10-12 deals with her worth to her family and their design
Vs 13-30 deals with the character traits that identify the design of this godly woman
Vs 31 deals with OUR responsibility to publicly give her recognition by letting everyone see these traits in action

I believe it all started here; where the scriptures in Genesis that say that the woman was created by God to be a “help meet” or in some translations “companion” for her husband has been reduced from “bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh” meaning “just like me”, or “equal”, to becoming a “domestic servant that will take care of my needs.” That’s the kind of mindset that has allowed women through the years to buy in to thinking that these verses in Proverbs are a “to do” list. We are hindered from actually seeing what is in them that allows fullness of life and the intended design for her that comes from the very heart of God.
Adam was alone. God saw that was not good so, He made him an equal; someone “just like him” - they were equal in the purposes and creation and image of God.

From the book “Captivating” by John and Staci Eldredge:
And God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and conquer it, and hold sway over the fish of the sea and the fowl of the heavens and every beast that crawls upon the earth.” – Genesis 1:26-28
Call it the Human Mission – to be all and do all God sent us here to do. And notice – the mission to be fruitful and conquer and hold sway is given both to Adam and to Eve. “And God said to them…” Eve is standing right there when God gives the world over to us. She has a vital role to play; she is a partner in this great adventure. All that human beings were intended to do here on earth – all the creativity and exploration, all the battle and rescue and nurture – we were intended to do together. In fact, not only is Eve needed, but she is desperately needed.

The word used (ezer) to describe what God wanted to create for Adam is inadequately translated in English as “companion” or “helper” or “help meet”. What little girl dances through the house singing “One day I will be a help meet?” Or companion? A dog can be a companion. Or helper? Sounds like an assistant to the person who holds the real authority. The actual word used is only used twenty other times in the entire Old Testament and in every other instance the person being described is God Himself, when you need Him to come through for you desperately. It means to be there right beside you as a lifesaver. Or you’re dead!

We often blame Eve for dropping the ball first with the eating of the fruit. But I believe it was Adam who dropped the ball first. He neglected his original role as her protector, provider, and representative of God to her by not watching over her close enough to see what was going on and help her and keep her safe from the situation. He, apparently, had somehow assumed the mind-set that Eve was there for him and his purposes and needs; and because of that inward view of her role he was there with her physically but not spiritually, intellectually, or emotionally and missed the greatest need of her life.
After the disobedience in the garden when they ate of the fruit of the tree they were instructed not to, God explains that this was how it was going to be from now on…

16 Then he said to the woman,
“I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth. And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.”


This is the direct result of the sin they fell into and it is not a directive from God. We have wanted to take what God says here about her desire to control her husband and his rule over her as if God had for some “new reason” came up with a new way of relationship that will help them. This isn’t the way God set it up in the beginning…and nothing in the relationship had changed except - it is now viewed through and lived out as the result and rule of sin; it is not God’s declaration of their “new roles” in some twisted form of hierarchy…it is Him acknowledging their need.

17 And to the man he said,
“Since you listened to your wife and ate from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat, the ground is cursed because of you. All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it. 18 It will grow thorns and thistles for you, though you will eat of its grains. 19 By the sweat of your brow will you have food to eat until you return to the ground from which you were made. For you were made from dust, and to dust you will return.” – Genesis 3:16-19 NLT


He’s not referring to actual thorns and thistles or we could evade the curse and rule of sin by not working the ground and finding another career to work in. No. He’s talking about life being hard, and worry, and fear of not providing, and turmoil in relationships, and life will just be hard.

We haven’t come very far in all these years. Because of sin, both men and women have allowed this miss-guided mind-set of “God cursed Eve to be submissive and the man to be the ruler” to creep into the DNA of our relationships throughout the centuries and women have taken the brunt of the pain, slavery, isolation, shame, work, and death throughout the ages.
But her original design, and part of the redemptive purposes of God, is to be the lifesaver. This is what we see unfolding before us in the Proverbs 31 woman.

The original design for her is to be the lifesaver. Now, since sin entered their lives, SHE has become the tired worker, the slave, the sex-object, the baby machine, the cook and janitor, the maid or the trophy…the biggest complaint counselors get from women is: “I feel like a kitchen appliance.”
Proverbs 31 takes us to a new level
Verse 10 says, “Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?”
Virtuous – a force of means, resources, virtue, valor, strength
This is not a quiet, mousy, hidden, and timid character trait! How does a woman find that kind of strength and valor and still not come across as overbearing turning everyone in her life away from her?

Proverbs 31 unfolds it a bit for us (actually in 17 ways)

13 – happy in her work
She looks for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight. NAS
14 – fun, treats for the family, always a surprise waiting for them, exotic
She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. NLT
15 – CEO capable
She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan

the day’s work for her servant girls. NLT
16 – has her “own” earnings to use at her discretion in business dealings
She goes to inspect a field and buys it; with her earnings she plants a vineyard. NLT
17 – takes care of her body – lots to go wrong
She girds herself with strength And makes her arms strong. NAS
18 – business savvy and applies herself to it
She makes sure her dealings are profitable; her lamp burns late into the night. NLT
19 – a hands-on worker, not afraid to get it done, identify with the average “worker bee”
Her hands are busy spinning thread, her fingers twisting fiber. NLT
20 – involved in the community with the less fortunate – benevolent, philanthropist – she

gives out and takes ‘em in
She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy. NLT
21 – family’s satisfaction comes from her capabilities and skills
She has no fear of winter for her household, for everyone has warm clothes. NLT
22 – likes to dress nice
Ornamental coverings she hath made for herself, Silk and purple [are] her clothing.
23 – likes to see her husband/brother/son/father looked up to because of her dealings –

the lifestyle is one of civic involvement – they belong
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of

the land. NIV
24 – an entrepreneur
She makes belted linen garments and sashes to sell to the merchants. NLT
25 – has a plan and investing in the future
She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.
26 – a life coach
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. NLT
27 – involved in the daily lives of her kids and spouse
She looks well to the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28, 29 – because of her involvement her family likes to stick around where she is – they know

by her investment in them that they are valued
Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her: “There are many virtuous

and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!” NLT
30 – knows that beauty is only skin deep
Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will

be greatly praised.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Her priorities…


Among those who are SHE - There are those who have wasted or are wasting their influence and aggressively trying to overturn God’s design for woman by trying to make us believe that defining independence as equality will empower women with their “due” Independence does not bring equality, but one of the God-designed fruits of equality is independence
Among those who are SHE - their God-given gifts and strengths have been ignored or crushed in favor of doing what is expected of them in serving the needs of others
Among those who are SHE - there are those who have been mistreated and abused and exploited
Among those who are SHE - there are those who have never been given the opportunity to see how God has made them and how walking in that design makes them more productive and happy and fulfilled and influential, and successful
Among those who are SHE - there are those who just need to be told that Jesus is for you – regardless…because He’s not measuring you by a list of qualifications, He loves you and champions you as you are and wants you to be free and to live. (and guys, this is our example)
John 8:3-11
3 As he was speaking, the teachers of religious law and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery. They put her in front of the crowd.
4 “Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?”
6 They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. 7 They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!” 8 Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.
9 When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. 10 Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”
11 “No, Lord,” she said.
And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”


I would assume the redemptive work of God is exactly that; redemptive?

What if we looked at this story in Jesus’ life and said it this way: Jesus, we found this girl caught up in human trafficking and we want to know what to do with her…
From the result of sins curse we want to look at the activity as a perpetration – she’s the perpetrator, she’s guilty.
From the result of redemption and God’s design and intent, we can see the activity as exploitation – a victim – and we want to do all we can to get her to a place where she can live free and be all that she can be with a safe, clean, productive, and cherished life. And not only is her heart restored with God in relationship, but her design and purpose as a woman is restored also.


So, if we were to continue thinking that the design and role of women is to be ruled under the world of men – we’re living under the curse and result of sin and not the plan of God’s redemptive purposes for us. To the women of this fellowship, I apologize.

I want to live in an environment where the women of my life, my wife, my daughter, my mother, my sisters, my friends, and the women of my church are living redeemed of the curse of sin; including its attitudes of submission and hierarchy that more resemble a crushed spirit and lack of identity and purpose than a righteous heart. That attitude actually reveals the fear, selfishness, greed, and lack of generosity in the hearts of men – not a plan for a woman’s “role” or design.

I, as a redeemed man, as a pastor, want to produce for those who are SHE an environment similar to the one our Lord made for us when He said to come and be set free from sin and death and its curse and begin abundantly living according to the design God intended for you through Jesus Christ; where you become a joint-heir with Christ, an equal in God’s eyes, rightfully called the children of God, and everything that is His is ours by the grace of God.